Do you want to get out of your current relationship?
Well, you’re not alone. A friend sent the message below to my friend (I asked to show this here) about how she wanted to let go of his boyfriend:
It was hard to tell him that I no longer wanted to be in a relationship with him. We had been through so much together and I loved him, but I knew it was time to let go. I hated myself for breaking his heart, but I knew it was the right thing to do.
The truth is — breaking up is hard to do — but sometimes it’s necessary.
If you’ve decided that you no longer want to be in a relationship with someone, there are ways to tell that person that without causing too much pain.
How to know when you’re not happy in a relationship anymore
If you’re not happy in your current relationship, it may be time to end things. Here are some signs that you may be ready to move on:
1. You’re constantly fighting with your partner.
Do you constantly fight with each other?
All couples fight occasionally, but if you’re constantly bickering and arguing, it’s a sign that something is wrong.
Yes, there are plenty of reasons why people fight. But when the fight is over something insignificant and voices rise, contention tends to rise as well.
Unfortunately, contention and love cannot coexist with each other — at least not that long. So constant fighting might be a reason why you’re not happy anymore.
2. You’re no longer interested in being intimate with your partner.
Do you count the seconds while your partner is hugging you — or worse, is trying to talk with you?
If you don’t want to be intimate with your partner anymore, it may be a sign that you’re no longer interested in the relationship.
Intimacy is an important part of any relationship — it helps couples feel connected to each other. It’s like the lubricant of the love machine.
That’s why if you’re no longer interested in doing intimate things with your partner, it’s a sign that you may be ready to move on.
3. You don’t enjoy spending time together anymore.
Do you wish to be anywhere rather than on your partner’s side?
Couples who are in love tend to enjoy each other’s company. They like doing things together, whether it’s watching a movie, going for a walk, or just cuddling on the couch.
But if you find that you’d rather be anywhere else rather than being with your partner, it may be a sign that the relationship is no longer working for you.
4. Your relationship feels like a chore.
Do you feel like you’re in a relationship just because it’s what’s expected of you?
A lot of couples stay together even though they’re unhappy just because they feel like they have to. They think that getting out of the relationship would be too hard, or they don’t want to be alone.
But if your relationship feels like a chore, it may be time to call it quits.
5. You don’t feel like you’re being yourself.
Do you feel like you’re putting on a mask when you’re around your partner?
When you’re in a relationship, it’s normal to want to impress your partner. But if you find that you’re constantly putting on a show or pretending to be someone you’re not, it’s a sign that the relationship is not healthy.
It’s important to be able to be yourself around your partner. If you can’t, it may be time to end the relationship.
6. You’re considering or have already cheated on your partner.
Have you been thinking about cheating on your partner? Or have you already cheated?
If you’ve been unfaithful, it’s a clear sign that you’re no longer happy in the relationship.
Cheating is a betrayal of trust and it can be very difficult to forgive and forget. If you’ve cheated on your partner, it’s best to come clean and tell them what happened.
It’s also important to remember that cheating is a decision — it’s not something that just happens. So if you’ve been thinking about cheating, it’s a sign that you’re not happy in your current relationship.
How to “gently” tell the other person that you want to break up
If you’re considering breaking up with your partner, it’s important to do it in a way that is respectful and considerate.
No one likes to be blindsided by a breakup, so it’s best to have a conversation about it beforehand.
Here are some tips on how to break up with someone:
1. Choose a good time to talk.
Don’t break up with your partner in the heat of the moment — give them some time to process what you’re saying.
Choose a time when you’re both calm and collected so that you can have a respectful conversation.
It’s also important that you approach your partner and the topic calmly. Prepare yourself mentally and emotionally before you talk to them.
2. Be honest about your reasons.
Look, you may already be thinking of some “reasons” why you want to break up with your partner.
However, don’t try to sugarcoat your reasons for breaking up. Be honest with your partner about why you’re no longer interested in the relationship.
The least you can do is give them a chance to understand your decision and maybe even change things (when possible, of course).
3. Don’t be accusatory.
Don’t make it harder on either of you by placing blame on your partner. Breaking up is hard enough as it is, so try to avoid making it an even more emotionally charged situation.
Try to avoid attacking your partner or putting blame on them. Instead, focus on how you’re feeling and why you think it’s time to end the relationship.
There’s no need for name-calling or finger-pointing. Just state your case calmly and rationally and end the relationship.
4. Be prepared for their reaction.
Your partner may not take the news well, so it’s important to be prepared for their reaction since you won’t be hearing this:
They may become emotional or even angry, but try to stay calm and remember that this is a difficult situation for both of you.
Of course, I’m not saying that you should be prepared for them to lash out at you. But it’s important to be ready for any kind of reaction and to keep your cool no matter what.
5. Give them time to process.
After you’ve broken up with your partner, give them some time to process the news.
It’s important to respect their feelings and give them space to grieve the loss of the relationship. Don’t try to force them into anything or rush them through the grieving process.
Allow them the time and space to come to terms with the breakup in their own way. Yes, even if you’re not that affected by the breakup, it’s still important to give them time to adjust.
Breaking up with someone is never easy, but it’s important to do it in a way that is respectful and considerate.
By following these tips, you can help both you and your partner to move on from the relationship without causing too much hurt or pain.
How to deal with the aftermath of a breakup
Let’s switch things up — what if you’re on the receiving end of this article?
If your partner broke up with you, it can be a difficult and painful experience. But there are ways to deal with the aftermath of a breakup in a healthy and positive way.
Here are some tips on how to deal with the aftermath of a breakup:
1. Give yourself time to grieve.
It’s normal to feel sad, angry, or even numb after a breakup. Give yourself time to process your emotions and grieve the loss of the relationship.
There is no need to pretend like you’re okay when you’re not. It’s perfectly normal to need some time to yourself after a breakup.
2. Avoid making major decisions.
Try to avoid making any major decisions in the aftermath of a breakup. This includes things like changing jobs, moving houses, or getting into a new relationship.
You don’t want to look like this a few months later:
Remember that you’re going through a difficult time and you might not be thinking as clearly as you normally would. Give yourself some time to adjust before making any major decisions.
3. Stay busy.
One of the best ways to cope with a breakup is to stay busy. Keep yourself occupied with work, hobbies, or time with friends and family.
Don’t let yourself dwell on the breakup or wallow in your sorrows. Instead, focus on positive things and keep yourself busy.
4. Seek professional help.
If you’re struggling to cope with a breakup, seek professional help. A therapist can help you deal with your emotions and get through this difficult time.
Don’t be afraid to reach out for help if you’re struggling. There is no shame in seeking professional help after a breakup.
Moving on after a tough breakup
Breaking up is never easy, but it can be even more difficult when you’re not sure how to go about it.
I hope that this article was able to help you make the process a little less painful – both for you and the person you’re breaking up with.
Remember, honesty is always the best policy so be gentle but honest in your approach.
Finally, don’t forget to take care of yourself after a breakup. Allow yourself time to mourn the loss of the relationship and don’t be afraid to reach out for support if you need it.
Have something to share? Questions? Stories? Please don’t hesitate to leave your thoughts in the comment section below.
